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Here's a commentary from Tom McMahon that's sure to attract a huge readership. He's looking at the mystery of the female — the problems they've posed for celibate men — what women mean for the future church. And he's also talking about sex and sport. You couldn't get a better collection of topics that polite people ought not talk about in public.

Woman is a high priority sacrament. It is time we recognized her value.
Oh why can't a woman be like a man? the mystery of the female … future church?

Only a fool would begin to write a paper on women, a commentary that will reach around the world; I can see them now, particularly women readers saying "who is this guy and what kind of expert does he think he is?" Remember I'm the fellow standing in the abandoned train station with a ticket to nowhere and still wondering what a marriage union is all about; I'm exploring and hoping to create dialogue among the People of God, particularly around the role of women. After previous commentaries you must know by now that we can't count on the celibate clergy for direction; we are on our own as we attempt to fathom the mystery of life and marriage. For me the Unfathomable Mystery we call God is most likely to be found in the female who with her wonderful biological power emulates best the Creator. Woman is a high priority sacrament. It is time we recognized her value.

A simple chromosome dictates gender and silently transforms a fetus into male or female. Looking at the female body one realizes quickly that progesterone fashions anatomical curves and tissue that is soft and appealing to the male eye. One might use the word "coy" as one senses the protectiveness with which she guards her reproductive system and yet unlike quail (plain feathers blending for safety in the natural grass) the human female preens her hair and face and is often overly-concerned about her outward appearance and attractiveness. The process begins in the innocence of puberty, the budding female unaware of how already attractive she really is. Soft, hairless tissue attracts as does a baby's skin. A new-born as he roots knows the inviting tenderness of the female breast … do we ever lose it?

Venus de Milo — a provocative image to a 14 year-old future priest

I recall a disturbed woman, coming to see the priest, she offering ample bare cleavage; her first menacing question "Are you looking at my breasts?" I knew an honest answer would spring the trap, so I demurely lied with "of course not … and what can I do for you spiritually today". Since I first saw a picture of Venus De Milo in my first year high Latin text book I have had great admiration for the Creator's art work on mammary glands. At 14 I drew a bra on the picture, hoping I would not be caught by the professor and I never told about it in weekly confession. I have long been fascinated by these beautiful fertility symbols, curious as to why we men are so interested in secondary sexual appendices. The great mysterious power lies hidden and there is treasure in her mind.

Father, why do you show these dirty things?

In 1966 at St. Leo's Church in San Jose we engaged a doctor and his wife to display plaster of paris type models of fetal development; parents signing a letter asking their young to attend the separate presentations for boys and girls. Two children, not allowed permission by their wealthy parents, stayed outside with me, the boy finally asking "Father, why do you show these dirty things".

I had started out in 1956 talking at Catholic Mothers' Guilds on the value of healthy sexual information to their children I was approached by an Italian Catholic nurse and mother of four who asked me to talk to the 8th grade class of Our Lady of Angels grammar school in Burlingame, Ca.; I talked her into giving the sex education course with other parents and I assisted by being the rep from the Catholic church who said this was great and ok with God. Out of the seminary just two years I learned a lot from Enes' course. We are friends to this day, my visiting Enes and Elio recently, discovering she has Parkinson's. I have always had a schizophrenic problem with the way mother church talked down human sexuality as if having a x-chromosome destined the female to second-rate citizenship in the Roman institution. I'm grateful that my mother had an 'x' and that my father was interested in her charm.

I do find some conflict in today's exhibition of the female body. TV has created a big problem, a situation in which the male can see but cannot touch. At intermission of a Sharks Ice Hockey game my wife surfed to the Miss USA contest, tall, glossy sleek and slender, virginal white bikini clad females, parading in military like fashion, all with a plastic smile. I have heard the outcry of the father who said if his daughter had a nice figure she had a right to show it as she wished … ok … I still can't cry "fire" in a crowded theate … but could there be more than just monetary prizes and crowns? At our Senior History Club we got into discussion of the nudity of the female, especially on TV shows like Dancing With the Stars. I proposed a Starwars theory that perhaps the American female, fully armed with contraceptive devices, with her biological clock ticking was having inner struggle with human nature … the message: come look at me and find me appealing but just look … and there is the empty womb! Now that's a theory pregnant with meaning; by the way, the Greek word pregnant means heavy and is connected to paranoid (heavy in the head). I suggest America has an abusive outlook on the female body that accompanies a number of pathologies. Could one be suffering from breast deprivation as an infant? Our two breast-fed sons seem to have little problem as adults.

There is a Middle Ages device made of iron, that fits like a jock strap cup over the penis, it having spikes within that impale with sexual swelling, a monastic answer that has not found its way into modern times. (In CLERICAL ERROR, 2002, read Robert Blair Kaiser decrying the use of flagellation in 20th century Jesuit novitiates.) Perchance rape, sexual abuse, and trafficking in sex are the negative human responses to whatever is meant by exposing Victoria's Secret. The Creator did a splendid job on the female body but also equipped man with reason and responsibility. When son Tommy was 8th grade he asked me to buy him a subscription to Playboy magazine; my wife and I talked it over, aware that Tommy had said "Grandpa gets it". We made conditions, it never leaving our home, never to be hid under the mattress or shared with a fellow student and he would have to pay for the 2^nd year; Tommy never did resubscribe … no way was he going to put out his hard earned money. Tommy, now 30, eagerly waits the delivery of wife Phuong's first child.

Oh, why can't a woman be like a man?

Henry Higgins (Rex Harrison) and Eliza Doolittle in a scene from My Fair Lady.

"Oh, why can't a woman be like a man" sings Henry Higgins in My Fair Lady… and Tom comments: thank God she's different! Yes, the female eats, sleeps, breathes, and walks on two feet as do I; there is mystery in the way she thinks and feels (at times I let this drive me nuts). I can make comparison to what it can be like to have no woman around, like in the sterile days of priesthouse living. We had one housekeeper, super-adult or beyond the age of attractiveness, who cackled at night. The pastor would not let her go until he found out she had mastered the combination on the parish safe and rifled a bunch of his money. Most of the pastors I served with were masochistic misogynists … and JP2 and B16 today claim celibacy is the crown jewel of the church..

In my pursuit of psychological studies I had courses on anatomy, studying the human figure, reading the psychology of the person in the muscle system and body expressions and repressions. I learned to admire creation. When in a castle in Spain I had my picture taken with a statue of a Borgia pope who had seventeen grandchildren; I remarked to a fellow married priest … "we have been snookered".

Yes, the great con job of the church of the Middle Ages was to portray the woman as evil. They are still at it with Magdalene. Ancient fear of the woman goes back into ignorance of human biology and her mysterious power to create. The Torah speaks of avoidance of menstrual blood and it contaminating ability and early Christians fell for the nonsense when they kept the celebrating priest away from his wife. Mid-wives were persecuted during the Middle Ages and we all know about the Salem witch trials. I have clear remembrance of my one and only "churching of a woman after child birth". I was newly ordained and did not read the ritual before the ceremony; it was a disgusting male ranting incantation that I jumped around and through in embarrassment … never again and the same for the blessing of a woman at a nuptial mass that highlighted her possible infidelity … Out foul spots!

Sport — today's "God"...

Modern times are not so much different, particularly in the religion of sport. Today's national god is Sport! It is a massive money maker; the word fan is short for fanatic and fans there are aplenty.

Its semi-gods are heroic athletes with the female making her way into the financial pantheon. TV is the pulpit and sports announcers are the preachers of the good news of victory. Like the Roman Coliseum only the victors live on and the defeated go into oblivion as failed human beings; violence is sport's creed. There is the endless cycle of birth of the new semi-gods, starting with little league for the babies and the constant resurrections in going for the crown of glory and the selling of a few veterans as models of living correctly. In the pursuit of perfection, muscle and tattooed bodies are king with the vestal virgins giving a touch of gentility to the brutality by parading around in skimpy costume. The custom started in Texas where liquor was forbidden on college campus and the men left at half time to return half-potted; the girlie show kept them on site. Every one knows inebriated men make poor lovers; alcohol kills the power of testosterone.

I watch for professional skills, well aware that sex appeal is used powerfully. In watching the NCAA woman's basketball championships I heard the male announcer refer to one of the hefty women as a "virtual machine" (FUTURE SHOCK, '70'S by Alvin Toffler). A young female, talented in volley ball, admitted that in return for her university scholarship she gave up her freedom to do things that would normally be part of a young person's involvement in life, e.g. she was not allowed to snow or water ski. I had opportunity to talk with young woman years ago who entered the convent only to find their menstrual period disappeared. One wonders if the pressure in today's world of sport isn't doing harm to the psyche as well as the steroid enhanced body? Anorexia and bulimia are disabling pathologies, yet a well-known and used tool for Hollywood style body success, As a cancer survivor I see stress as a major contributor to the cancer epidemic. I'm not really a Ruben's man; I am all for healthy bodies, particularly those who can reproduce healthy children..

I have had conversation with women who are offended as I mention the possible destiny of the female based on her biology. Father Andrew Greeley praised the Creator for placing the mammary glands up high, the better to see and admire. Is that all there is? To the immature male mind the modern brassiere can make a 60 year old woman look sexually fertile and attractive. I am aware that women who have happily had children normally have a bit of a sag in the stomach area and wear less provocative clothing. My wife once remarked to me about her stretch marks and I replied I valued them as souvenirs of our two sons. As I watch Dancing With the Stars I am aware of our children and grand kids being nursed and the advice given by Desmond Morris in THE NAKED WOMAN that small breasts give milk more easily. I did ask my psyche nurse friend about the big balloon silicone jobs and she told me they caused no great problems, physically … how about psychologically? I'm told more woman have breast reduction in America than implantation. While watching BAY WATCH Tommy, then 14, turned and asked "do these woman have to have silicone jobs to be on this show? the guys must get fooled a lot."

Is the modern world literally creating the bionic woman? And are men being fooled into thinking a sculptured female figure is possession enough to live with, happily ever after? I live with a silent, quiet person who wears no cosmetics nor jewellery. Elaine is at home in the garden with her hands in the soil, growing something; Grandma Elaine returns to being sixteen when our grand kids are over and I am jealous as they play. Elaine won't travel any more but she plans to drive 100 miles to baby sit our third grandchild, yet to come. Oh, why can't a woman be like a man? I know how fortunate I am to have met Elaine back in 1959; of course I had the model of the great woman of my life, my mother.

Years ago I wrote an article for Mother's Day, addressed to my own mother living at that time; I titled it "Take care for yourself, Mom", my gist being that Mother had spent herself in caring for us kids and I was grateful, especially for the body and life I have. Now could Mom take care unto herself. So here's to you, ladies! when I am at my best I know how valuable you are. Please when you take over the Roman institution don't forget us poor blokes and continue to forgive our foibles. We need you as that X chromosome predicted and we ask pardon for our mistreatments.

P.S. the following is taken from a post to East Coast American friends ……. I can see the "bishop" of tomorrow (2170 ce) having to be trained in a seminary that has a Hubble Telescope. When I read about the four women bishops being ordained I winced as they journey back into the Middle Ages; I wonder if they wear the pointy hats? Yves Congar called both sexes "priestly people".

Tom McMahon San Jose, Ca. six more days until I touch down in Sydney (one of my friends suggests I may need a bullet proof vest but the editor can report, having now met Tom, that his friend's advice was way off the mark!) 21/04/2009

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Image Credits: The image used in the headline is adapted from an image available from AllPosters entitled "Tender Passion" available at: www.allposters.com. Clicking on the images in the body of the article will take you to the original source.

[Index of Commentaries by Tom McMahon]