In this commentary, Daniel, writing from the perspective of a young single man, explores his perceptions on sex and human sexuality synthesised through Christian insight and biblical references…

Sex in today's world is everywhere and is something that Christians, especially youthful ones, struggle with. It's always in your face and it's always available in some shape or form. From what you could call 'humble beginning', sex has come along way, as it is venerated and encouraged these days. For young believer's like myself, it is hard to know what is right and what is wrong, along with the "how far can I go before God's smites me?" While I am no relationship expert, I would like in this essay to explore the Biblical views on sex, how the Church feels on the matter and study the challenges and joys awaiting us.

Why doesn't God like sex?

	Artist: Judy Chicago "Voices From The Song Of Songs 3/9" (Diptych 1) Heliorelief, Lithograph, Hand Coloring, 20 in x 24 in. Website: www.lewallencontemporary.com

People often ask me, "Why doesn't God like sex?" This is a rather interesting question itself, as it seems that the questioner has the idea that God doesn't like sex. While one might see in movies or read in books, medieval Christians mortifying themselves because they had thought of sex this view on how Christians approach sex is outdated and couldn't be further from the truth. God in fact does approve of sex; He did create it after all. The real question is, "How does God feel about sex and what does He have to say about it?"

One might be surprised to find that there isn't as much written on this subject in Sacred Scripture as one might think.

Perhaps the first and best description of human sexuality can be found with the Book of Genesis:

So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman', for she was taken out of man."

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. …Genesis 2:21-24

This description and statement forms a large part on what the Church teaches about human relationships and intimacy. While the phrase, "they will become one flesh" might be seen as purely sexually or purely relationally, we must understand it has both elements, and even more. The man and woman, are ordained to be one and are united as one, by doing so they become one, they become husband and wife. After this, the Lord is pleased with His creation and commands them to be fruitful and multiple. There is another verse in Genesis about the relationship between man and woman which is often overlooked:

Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, and said, "I have acquired a man from the LORD." …Genesis 4:1

While the natural result of sex is of course giving birth to children, the author of Genesis was not oblivious to this; he continues to give another reason for sex within the man woman relationship. Now Adam knew Eve his wife. It is clear that the author is trying to send the message of the uniqueness of the husband and wife relationship. A married man knows his wife in a unique way that no other man can or should know, and a married woman knows her husband in a unique way that no other woman can or should know. Sex strengthens the bonding between marriage partners. They continue to learn about each other, so they might know one another.

Yet what about premarital sex? Can two become one flesh without being married?

Pre-marital sex and adultery…

The Bible is very little to say about about premarital sex, however it is vocal about a sin called adultery. Adultery can be best described as voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and one who is not his or her spouse. In the Book of Exodus, adultery is made unlawful in the sixth commandment. Jesus was uncompromising in what he had to say on this subject. He claimed, "he who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matt 5:28) and at the time, the punishment for committing such a sin was death (Deu 22:22). This is radical teaching and one that constantly sticks with me.

The call of Jesus to remain pure and to remain true to your husband or wife is a call echoed by the Church as well. The Church teaches that human sexuality was created by God with the twin purposes of procreation and intimacy-bringing a sexually active couple into a close emotional and spiritual relationship through the close physical relationship and as such, it should be restricted to a lifelong relationship between a man and a woman.

I must admit I love reading the joyous songs and romantic dialogue of the newly weds in the book Song of Songs. It tells the tale of two newly weds and their tender thoughts about one another, the erotic love they share and the sexual desire they have for one another. They have such passion and love for one another, a passion and love I pray that I will receive from my future wife. While I know and am well aware that it won't be all roses and candles but full of thorns and stones, we must be up to the challenge. After all, marriage isn't easy, I'm single. From what I've learned from my parents, I know marriage has its joys and its pains, and I firmly believe that sex is a God given joy.

Let's face it God isn't against sex!

©2007 Daniel Gullotta

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