Cindy's secret addiction...

This week a parishioner asked Cindy: "If you knew you only had one more week to live, how would you spend the week?"

Without hesitation Cindy replied: "I would pig out on chocolate for the entire week. Breakfast lunch, tea and in between. Mars Bars, Cherry Ripes, Tim Tams. Then I would get into the real chocolate - Caramello, Brazil Nut, Cashew Nut - all Cadburys of course! Chocolate cake with icing and walnuts would be high on the menu. Also Pecan Pie with thick double King Island cream. All this would be washed down with gallons of cappuccinos and Toblerone Coctails."

Cindy threw her head back laughing and chortled: "I won't have to worry about all the extra weight I will gain because I won't need to buy new clothes and I won't be carrying my coffin."

Well the parishioner looked at her aghast. "My goodness" was all she could mutter. She obviously expected an answer of sickly sweet piety.

"So what would you do?" Cindy casually asked her.

"Well I would go to Confession, say lots of prayers, and pray many Rosaries. I would spend as much time with my family as possible, throw out all my old letters and make sure my Will was in order."

"So, no special favourite foods would occupy you then?"

"Well no, that sounds like gluttony," she coyly replied. "But I am not saying that you are a glutton," she added to Cindy's amusement.

Cindy wanted to throw herself on the floor and roll around laughing and laughing.

What a scream life is...

What a scream life is. We spend so much time in our older years thinking about food but not eating the things we really like. Our favourite foods either have too high a fat content, contain too much sugar or cholesterol, are bound to put on further weight, or will rot any remaining teeth that should have survived thus far.

A few days later Cindy was at a Small Church Meeting and asked the 5 female members present the question "If you knew you had only one week to live, what would you do?"

The answers came quick and fast:
"Panic";
"Spend time with my family";
and three women announced in unison, "Clean out my cupboards!!"

The women had all been involved, at some point in their life, in clearing away someone else's possessions from a home following a death. In most cases it was a parent.

One lady was adamant, "I do not want my children to have to go through my little home and dispose of a lot of stuff — I would go through my cupboards and take things to the St Vincent de Paul shop and give what I could to my children and grandchildren."

Interestingly, not one lady had mentioned anything at this point about the state of their soul or the notion of rushing to Confession to be cleaned up ready for departure to the afterlife.

Eventually, the comment was made that it would be nice to have a final Anointing as it also includes Absolution.

An 84 year old woman could remember the nuns at school teaching her that even if you had lived a 'wicked' life and begged forgiveness of God on your death bed, God would forgive you and open the gates of heaven!!!!!

Another women in her 80's (taught by a different Order of nuns) said she was taught that if you lived a wicked life, it would be all too late on your deathbed. The conversation then turned to 'what are our young people today being taught in our schools today'?

"What exactly determines a 'wicked' life?"

This leaves one with another question, "What exactly determines a 'wicked' life?"

Some of Cindy's friends, particularly those in their 80's expressed the desire to live many more years because there is still much they would like to do in their lives. They are not afraid of death but enjoy life to the full.

The ladies had a good cackle over the fact that in their school years many years earlier, they had all attended Mass on the First Friday of nine consecutive months. It was believed this practice ensured you of not dying in mortal sin and going to hell. Cindy herself had made these nine First Fridays three times just to be sure!! That was all before she turned fifteen.

So Cindy, now in her sixties, leaves you to think of your own answer to this question about having one week to live.

In the midst of the chocolate binge, it is most likely Cindy too would spend time with family, clean cupboards, check her Will, write letters for the grandchildren to read in future years, and have a final Anointing.

Cindy had always had a fear of being buried alive when perhaps she was really only in a deep coma. She requested of her friends that if she was declared dead would they please hold a piece of chocolate against her lips, because if there was any life left in her she would respond. Cindy is reflecting upon the saints who perhaps would like the Communion Host to be the last thing that passed through their lips before death.

Cindy sighed, realizing she still has a lot to learn about living the Christian Life. She followed through with those thoughts over a cappuccino and chocolate cake with one of her close girlfriends at a local café. The daily special was coffee & cake for $5, tailor made for good friends pondering the deeper questions about life!!

Cindy the Sacristan is the first new character to be written by one of our other readers whose imagination has been fired by Cliff's Menagerie. In reality these are real-life memoirs of one of our members who would prefer to remain anonymous.

[Cindy's Archive]